Today we’d like to introduce you to Taylor Coleman.
Hi Taylor, can you start by introducing yourself? We’d love to learn more about how you got to where you are today?
My mother met my father, Vincent Maurice Coleman, in 1994, who is a St. Louis Cardinals Hall of Famer. Shortly after my mother fell pregnant with me, she realized my father was married. He previously lied to her and said he was not, and had cheated on his wife, Lynette, several times. He didn’t show up to the hospital the day I was born, and when I turned eight years old, he told my mother, “that’s your daughter now.” He blocked our house number and vanished. I spent my whole life not knowing where my father was, or what he was doing, until earlier this year in 2022, at the age of 27. While I was back home visiting for an opening day game, I accidentally ran into my father, Vince Coleman. He was with my little brother, who I didn’t even know existed, and he didn’t know I existed either. My father was very dismissive toward me. He wouldn’t even look me in the eye when I asked him why he abandoned me, and he was extremely cruel… He even made me cry, but showed zero remorse. Instead of apologizing or trying to reconnect, he left the store never to be seen again. 20 years and that’s how he treated me. I cried a lot that day, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it for days to come. So, following that occurrence, I decided to write a book. The title of this book is “A Letter To My Dead Beat Dad – The Façade Is Over,” available for purchase on Amazon. This book explores the terrible ways in which my father has treated me, and explores my experience growing up with a phenomenal single mother, and beating the odds. I went to college, I got a degree, I built my own house… I have accomplished so much despite his absence, and I owe it all to my mother. Writing this book took an insane amount of courage. I was always too scared to speak up about my father because he has hurt me so badly and does not care about me, one single bit.
But after seeing him in the store after 20 years of abandonment, I felt my time is now, and I felt my voice needs to be heard. I truly believe God made that incident in the store happen. I want to be the voice for all of us who know what it’s like to be disposed of and forgotten by the people who created you. I want to be an inspiration to all children/adults who are still battling this form of trauma. That is my dream and my mission, to show people you can overcome this heartbreak and allow it to strengthen you. My father has 5 kids by 3 different women, and 2 of them I did not even know about until this year. So, my mission is to also fight to be connected with them, because it is apparent that his current wife does not want my father or their kids to have anything to do with me and my two older brothers, and I want to change that. I have already received such positive feedback regarding my book and lots of support from media outlets/cardinals fans/friends/family. So, I will continue to ensure my voice is heard, the voices of the abandoned are heard, and I will continue fighting in hopes of making a positive impact on this world through my writing.
We all face challenges, but looking back would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
This definitely has not been a smooth road. Imagine having your number blocked by your father at 8 years old, and not even being able to say goodbye. He was never there… He completely vanished. He also stopped paying child support, which negatively impacted my mother. She thought she had found the man she would marry and be with, but he just disposed of her like garbage, too. She never deserved that. And his first wife, Lynette, who is the mother of my two older brothers, never deserved to be treated badly or cheated on, either. She was a great woman and actually invited my mother and I over to her house on various occasions. She wanted me and my brothers to be together, despite the circumstances. On the other hand, It has also been tough to deal with the ways this trauma has come to fruition. My book explores the ways in which I became a very isolated child. I felt like I wasn’t good enough for people, and had a hard time navigating those emotions and understanding them as a child. Additionally, I realize I have grown up not knowing how to properly love myself because my father never has, and not knowing how to love oneself, especially as a young child/teenager, is not good. My father’s absence affected many things. But now, as an adult, I’m learning to work through those traumas/emotions and learning to create power out of this pain. In my book, I offer advice on how to heal, as well as dive into the ways childhood trauma negatively affects adult relationships.
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
Currently, I am a cyber security account executive in the technology sales industry. However, my dream is to be a full-time author/poet. I absolutely love writing. Writing has been a big passion of mine for years, and I am currently focused on publishing another book which talks about my struggle of dealing with chronic back pain/an invisible diagnosis. I think what sets me apart from others is my humility, kindness, and genuine nature. Often I find most people don’t reciprocate those qualities. Everything I have been through has made me a very empathetic and compassionate person, and it’s hard to find people who exemplify those qualities in a genuine way.
So, I am proud of the heart I have, and I am proud of the mature mindset I have. I’ve always been told I’m wise beyond my years, and I feel I am more serious about my goals and more level-headed than most people in their 20s. The last thing I’ll say that sets me apart from others is my willingness to take risks. If you don’t take risks in life, nothing will change. But I want to create change in this world, so I am willing to take those risks. However, I can honestly say I was not always like that… It took a long time to become that kind of woman, and I’m still becoming the woman I was meant to be.
Is there any advice you’d like to share with our readers who might just be starting out?
In terms of addressing a new wound/or someone who has just experienced being abandoned, first I would want them to know that it is not their fault. My book goes into more detail about this, but one day they will realize that their trauma will often times propel them towards their purpose in life. And when that day comes, then they will be able to truly heal from what happened to them. I honestly believe everything happens for a reason… Sometimes it’s hard to know what that reason is when something bad has JUST happened… But one day it will all make sense. And most importantly, I want people to know that someone’s inability to see your worth does not mean you are worthless or unworthy of love. If a parent walks out of your life, they know exactly what they are doing. As said before, it is never the child’s fault. Lastly, do not let the cruel actions of your abuser, keep you from shining your light or keep you from speaking about your trauma. I wish I had someone tell me that when I was a little girl.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0BGNL5V9W/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?ie=UTF8&qid=&sr=
- Instagram: authorTMC
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100086158189740
- Twitter: authorTMC
