Today we’d like to introduce you to Rafaella Fiallo (pronouns: she/ella).
Hi Rafaella, thanks for joining us today. We’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
As a sexuality educator and therapist, people are very interested in knowing how I got into this work. They silently want to know if personal experiences encouraged me to take this path. And unabashedly, the answer is absolutely! Back in the day of using Ask Geez, scouring home encyclopedias, and many days inside the library, I was always searching for and soaking up information. In one of my social media bios, I’ve jokingly added that I was the kids’ next-door sex-positive friend. I grew up around friends who were comfortable talking about sex and dating, reading Toni Morrison, Eric Jerome Dickey, Zane, and others, and asking all the questions I wasn’t supposed to ask and looking for the answers myself when turned away. I developed a special interest in sex, sexuality, and mental health because of witnessing relationship difficulties, experiencing my traumas and struggles, and serendipitously being asked to hold positions of education and peer leadership.
I’ve provided sex education and counseling since high school in peer leadership roles in which students I mentored were experiencing pregnancy scares and struggling with anxiety, bullying, and depression. In college, I continued in student leadership positions as a Resident Assistant, leading programming around safer sex, sexual identity, and gender expression and promoting mental wellness. I was a psychology major and planned to become a child psychologist, working with youth who’d experienced sexual trauma and children who displayed concerning sexual behaviors. This was my plan all through college and graduate school. However, after working in more adult-centered organizations and facilities, I began shifting my focus to supporting adults with mental and sexual wellness.
In 2015, I co-founded Afrosexology with Dalychia Saah, a pleasure-based sex education multimedia platform that creates content centering on pleasure and liberation. In 2018, I opened my therapy practice, Healing Exchange, to provide a space “where dialogue leads to healing and discovery.” My practice specializes in supporting clients through the very things I’ve been studying nearly my whole life: relationships, sexuality, and trauma. In 2023, we became a small group practice of individuals of diverse identities and backgrounds who provide therapy, wellness coaching, and clinical training for other therapists.
Can you talk to us about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned? Looking back, has it been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Before becoming a therapist, I worked in management for a large department store. This gave me experience in understanding the core components of setting financial goals, identifying issues early on, and developing team talent. Starting my first business with a friend made entrepreneurship easy, fun, and rewarding in many ways. We’ve been able to center our needs, values, and dreams in our work, which isn’t always possible when you work for someone else, even more so if they don’t hold a shared vision. We also had the added benefit of accountability, which helped us stick to our commitments and reach several goals. What has been challenging is expanding my therapy business by hiring staff. There were a few unforeseen expenses related to hiring someone outside of the state, disappointments with contractors not delivering projects, developing new marketing strategies capturing the entire team and not just myself, and many more. I’m fortunate to have a supportive team and friends who were available to answer my questions, hold space for my frustrations, and connect me with colleagues who could help me figure out the next steps along the way. As a result, I’ve created a group of therapists who don’t hesitate to share resources and cheerlead one another. This isn’t for the faint of heart, and reminding myself that I don’t have to do anything alone has been life-changing.
We’ve been impressed with Healing Exchange LLC, but for folks who might need to be more familiar, what can you share about what you do and what sets you apart?
Many people have been taught not to discuss their traumas, sexuality, and relationship issues. So, we are honored to offer support around topics that tend to carry many questions and a history of shame or embarrassment. We are also a practice of BIPOC and queer-identified practitioners with advanced training in sex education and therapy, Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT), Eye-Movement Desensitization Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR), Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic Experiencing (SE), and Expressive Arts Therapy. Healing and processing in therapy are unique experiences, and we aim to create a unique approach for our clients. We also value holistic healing and offer meditation, sound healing, and reiki services for all interested.
I’m excited to share two more non-therapy offerings. Our Bibliophiles Book Club is accepting members anytime. We read one book a month and meet via Zoom monthly. Check out what we read this year, and join us at healingxchg.com/book-cub. We’ve recently started a podcast called Soft Landing: A Gentle Space for Self-Discovery. This podcast has three themes: sex/sexuality, relationships, and trauma. This is our way of creating a free and accessible resource for those who might not always be able to work with a therapist or coach. Therefore, we encourage listeners to submit questions to which we can add our insight and expertise during the episode—more at healingxchg.com/podcast.
How can people work with you, collaborate with you, or support you?
Want to work together? We’d love to! If you are an individual interested in therapy/coaching or are part of an organization ready to book an educational training or wellness workshop for your staff, don’t hesitate to reach out. Want to support? Visit our shop! Only some have insurance or the resources to pay for services not covered by insurance, such as coaching and sound baths. That’s where our accessibility fund comes in! This fund was created to assist people who need financial assistance. This fund is built from direct contributions and sales from our shop. If you’d like to support someone accessing care and wellness, visit healingxchg.com/accessibility-fund.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.healingxchg.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healingxchg/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/healingxchg
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/healing-exchange-llc
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/healingxchg
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@healingxchg
Image Credits
Erica Jones
