Today we’d like to introduce you to Shane Blackledge.
Hi Shane, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
I have included my testimony, which I share frequently at Celebrate Recovery meetings.
Testimony from Shane Blackledge
I’m a grateful believer in Jesus Christ. I struggle with drug addiction, anger, and codependency. My name is Shane Blackledge. I was born in 1979 at the Air Force Academy Hospital in Colorado Springs, Colorado. My father was a marine and later joined the Air Force, where he met my mother in Taipei, Taiwan, during the Vietnam War. They were married and had three children together. In 1982, my father was discharged from the Air Force, and my parents moved back to Waterloo, Iowa. Shortly after I started kindergarten, my mom got a phone call from her family that her brother and his wife had died in a tragic motorcycle accident. My mom told me she was going back to Taiwan to go to her brother’s funeral.
Soon after my mom returned to Taiwan, my parents divorced when I was 5. My life was turned upside down. My little sister was 4, and my brother was 2 then. I became responsible for looking after my siblings. Growing up without my mom was tough. I suffered from depression, fear, racial trauma, and anxiety as a child. I picked up codependency traits and felt guilty for the divorce. My dad struggled to find jobs after the Vietnam War. He had PTSD, an eating disorder, and a gambling addiction. He struggled to provide for us. My siblings and I did most of the cleaning, laundry, cooking, and dishes. I grew up inferior. We received food from the food bank and lived off ramen noodles, hamburger helper, and canned foods. My clothes came from Goodwill and garage sales. My dad never got me anything for my birthday, and I never had any birthday parties as a child. We were isolated and didn’t go to church or spend holidays together.
In 3rd grade, we moved to Evansdale. The kids made fun of me for being Chinese. I was one of the only minorities at the school. They would say mean things and speak to me in their version of Chinese. I was bullied. They laughed and mocked me for the shoes and clothes I wore. I was made fun of because of my skin color and slanted eyes. One time, I even got spit on and called racial slurs walking home from school. I was ashamed of being Chinese American. I felt like an outsider and that everyone looked at me differently. Around this time, I was molested by a teenager, further confusing my identity. I became distant, didn’t want affection, and had suicidal thoughts. By 8, I was smoking, drinking, and hanging out with troubled kids.
In 4th grade, I discovered my dad’s porn, leading to addiction and early sexual activity. I started believing my parents didn’t love me. In 5th grade, I got expelled for bringing a knife to school and was arrested for shoplifting. We moved again, and I set a fire at my school, damaging the building. In middle school, I had no ambition. I stole cars, broke windows, and got into fights. I was arrested a lot and spent my teen years in and out of juvenile detention. I used drugs and alcohol daily, learning to stuff my feelings. On the second day of high school, I got expelled for fighting. I knew I would get in trouble with my probation officer, so I ran away from home. This is when I got hooked up with some gang members that took me in. I was initiated into a Crip gang at 13 years old. This was the first time in my life that I felt important. They taught me how to be even more violent, shoot guns, and sell drugs. I figured, who needs an education when I can sell drugs and have all the money in the world—life in the fast lane?
By the time I was 16 years old, I had many so-called friends, cars, guns, clothes, jewelry, and an apartment. I had everything I ever dreamed of having. Having all these worldly possessions was meaningless, though. My life was a complete wreck. I was using drugs every day. I took prescription drugs on top of all that. I tried every single drug I could get my hands on. This was how I escaped the pain I felt inside for so long. My drug and alcohol addiction was out of control. I would drink a fifth of liquor every night plus a 12-pack. There were many nights that I got so wasted I would wake up in the middle of the street. My car was still running. Everyone passed out. Cash, drugs, and alcohol are all over the floor. Once, I fell asleep on the highway, going 80 miles per hour, and crashed into a bridge. There have been so many near-death experiences that I lost count. I also thought if I could make a lot of money, my problems would disappear. Money consumed my mind. All I cared about was making money. This was my idol. I had power and control when I had a safe full of cash. If I wanted it, I got it. Worldly possessions and greed consumed me. I was filled with selfish ambitions and pride. My goal was to be the most significant drug kingpin in Waterloo. Great goals, right? I was making a name for myself and getting all the attention I wanted. Soon, I was known for being one of the most dangerous and violent gang members in Waterloo. The feds, the cops, and the sheriffs were all watching me. It only took about five years of this lifestyle, and I was arrested for selling drugs, assault, and burglary. I was sentenced to prison for a total of 27 years at the age of 17.
Jail and Prison
I remember going to jail, changing into my jail outfit, and being taken to the general population, where all the criminals are. It was a big jail with a lot of inmates. People were in there for murder, robbery, theft, and drugs. I went to my cell and closed the door. I felt scared, lonely, and hopeless. I was a mess. I felt like I was broken into a million pieces. I got into big trouble this time and knew I wasn’t getting out anytime soon. I looked around at my cell. There was a concrete slab with a thin mattress, a sheet, and a really thin blanket. There was a toilet, sink, and a metal nightstand. I only had a toothbrush, toothpaste, a bar of soap, and half of a pencil. I sat on my bed and looked over at the nightstand.
There was a Gideon bible sitting there. I remember my Aunt Linda telling me to read the Book of John as a child, but I never did. I picked up and turned right to the Book of John. Right to the only verse I knew. John 3:16. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” I remember ten years earlier when my Aunt Linda and Uncle Jim sent me to Pine lake bible camp. A youth leader taught me to memorize that verse. There are some things you will never forget. Thank God for the seed that the counselor planted in me.
I got down on my knees and cried out to God. I let it all out, all the pain, all the suffering, all the anger, all the guilt, and shame. I knew I was a sinner, and God’s Word convicted me. I prayed to God, asking for forgiveness of my sins. I cried out to Jesus to save me and to teach me his will. As soon as I repented of my sins, I remembered this feeling inside me I never felt before. It was the Holy Spirit. I felt peace, comfort, joy, and love. This is something I never had before. I realized God loved me this whole time. I felt brand new. I realized what was missing in my life was love, Agape love, unconditional love. That day, I realized that God made me and I had a purpose to live. I was to be the light to others. Reading the bible gave me strength, hope, and encouragement. I knew going to prison was going to be the most formidable challenge I had ever faced. I learned that having a personal relationship with God was the only way I would do this time.
At the age of 17, I got my GED in jail. A few months after I got to prison, I was baptized in the Chapel at Anamosa State Penitentiary. I took college classes and signed up for a carpentry program. I knew that selling drugs wasn’t going to get me anywhere in life. If I wanted to be successful, I would need to get educated and learn a trade to get a job when I get out. If I wasn’t working or lifting weights, I studied the bible with other Christians. I strongly desired to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with other inmates and my family members back home. Many inmates received the gospel and were saved. Even though I was locked up and my freedom was taken away from me. I got to witness the power of God changing people’s lives. I saw prayers answered and miracles over and over. After years in prison, I was paroled. Sadly, my story doesn’t end triumphantly here. My life gets much worse. I went to the work release. I put in 75 applications before I was finally hired. It took several months to get a job. I was way behind on rent and owed thousands of dollars for fines and probation supervision fees. I was discouraged because of the lack of support I had in the community. I would go to church and feel disconnected from people there. I felt like an outcast. I was used to having everything supplied for me in prison. In prison, I didn’t have to worry about food, healthcare, shelter, bills, laundry, etc.
I was so fired up to do what God desired, leaving prison. I said I was going to do this and was going to do that. It only took a few months of being back in society, and I wanted to go back to prison. I suffered severe anxiety, panic attacks, and deep depression. Suicidal thoughts came back, and I felt like ending it all. Life out on the streets was too much. It was too hard to get established, and finally, the pressure pushed me to relapse. My addiction to drugs and alcohol and fear of being out on my own brought me back to prison. Together, I ended up going to prison five times and spent over 6 years of my life behind bars. I kept violating parole for not staying drug-free. Every time I got released, I would use more drugs, and it got worse. I was stuck in this vicious cycle of criminal thinking and drug addiction. This is what I call insanity. I was doing the same thing repeatedly, expecting a different result. I went through several drug treatment programs and attended NA and AA meetings to help me with my compulsive behaviors and addictions. The last time I was released from prison was in 2004. With my father’s help, I started my own construction business, A Plus Carpentry, in 2005.
My relationship with my father was restored during my prison time. We planned to invest in property rentals and flip houses together. With his help, I got the tools necessary to get licensed and bonded. I was determined to be successful and not let my past define me. I was clean for about two years, and then I relapsed. I was addicted to meth terribly. I couldn’t stop and didn’t care about my life anymore. I just wanted to give up. I failed my parents, I failed God, I failed my daughter, and I failed myself. This was the lowest point of my life. I felt horrible inside. My drug addiction had taken control of my life. Friday, December 8, 2006. I was given some bad meth, and I overdosed. My lungs collapsed, I was rushed to the hospital, and I was in the Intensive Care Unit on life support, fighting to stay alive. The team of nurses and doctors didn’t think I would make it. They contacted my family and told them I might not live through this. I was in a coma for three days. On December 10, 2006, on Sunday morning, I woke up connected to all these tubes and IVs and knew God had saved my life. I knew God had a purpose for my life. I should have been dead. I have had so many near-death experiences, but this one was different. My father and pastor were at the hospital praying for me while I was in a coma.
My dad had just recently accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior. I could tell because he was a completely different person. My dad told me he loved me for the first time in my life that I could remember. He said, “Son, I love you!” and wept. I had never heard him cry before. My pastor told me he loved me, and God told him I would be used in his Kingdom. Those words of encouragement and love at that time were miraculous and life-changing. God poured his love on me at the darkest point in my life, when I was weakest. I asked him to take my addiction away, and that day, I fully surrendered my life to Jesus. Today, I celebrate my recovery. I have 16 years clean from meth addiction, praise God.
At this time, my daughter was 3. I worked with the Department of Human Services, proved myself a fit parent, and regained custody of my daughter. My father was able to see me clean and sober for five months, and then he passed away from complications of a quadruple bypass heart surgery. During those five months, we spent time getting to know one another. I had gone years and years living a lifestyle that almost killed me many times. We grilled out, we talked, we laughed, we forgave, we went to church, and we had quality time. It was the best time I had ever had with him. I miss my father and often think about him. I started going to AA, NA, and eventually Celebrate Recovery. CR was like NA but better because my higher power was Jesus. I could relate to the Christ-centered approach. I was accepted like family. In CR, we are Forever Family.
One scripture stands out to me in light of going through a step study and attending CR. James 5:16: “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” This is a promise from God. There is healing by confessing and sharing. You begin to heal when you stop stuffing your feelings, emotions hurts, and pain; going through a step study has helped me process my pain and to share my testimony with others. I couldn’t stand here today and share my past without completing a step study. The step study gave me the courage to share and live out my Christian life unashamed of my past and the gospel.
I have a deeper relationship with God and others by working the Christ-centered 12 steps and 8 principles of Celebrate Recovery. My favorite step is Step 12. Having had a spiritual experience resulting from these steps, we carry this message to others and practice these principles in all our affairs. Nothing has impacted my life more than Celebrate Recovery. You see, this step is about giving back. I want people to experience Jesus Christ like I have. At 30, I returned to college, proving it’s never too late. I got an associate’s degree. To walk down the aisle was very special and one of my best achievements. During my time in college, I met Amber, my wife. We started dating and going to church. We both wanted God first in our lives and came from difficult pasts. She had her daughter, and I had my daughter. We received three blessings from God in 2013. Amber gave birth to our son. We were married at Celebration Church, and I asked my mom to come to our wedding, and she did. It had been 18 years since I last saw her. Mom ended up staying with us for one month, and it was one of the greatest moments of my lifetime. My mom still lives in Taiwan, and we have a wonderful relationship. I love her so much.
After receiving my Associate’s Degree, I attended the University of Northern Iowa & the University of Upper Iowa for Business Management. My education has helped me to run and operate a successful business for over 19 years. My business specializes in flooring, drywall, and home restoration. Over the years, I mainly hired felons to work for me, and I helped train and teach them a trade. Today, I’m a licensed contractor and certified HVAC technician with plumbing and electrical skills. I like to credit God for motivating me to be a life-long learner and push myself to try new things. I’m thankful for my wife, who is my best friend. We have a passion to serve God and reach the lost. She helped me realize and accept my calling to be a pastor. I’m grateful for my support system of accountability partners, mentors, and sponsors. I’ve learned to trust again because of the people God placed in my life.
My life verse is Proverbs 3:5-6 – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.” I don’t understand everything, and I try not to. Instead, I put my trust in God and allow him to direct me, guide me, and lead the way. One of the hardest things to do in my recovery was to forgive those who hurt me and forgive myself for my past sins, mistakes, and failures. I had to learn to let go and let God. I remind myself daily of how many times God has forgiven me. I have realized there is a purpose in the pain. For 5 years, I served as a youth leader at Life Church in Waverly, Iowa. I went through Inst Bible College and became a credentialed pastor. I am currently working on my Bachelor’s Degree in Theology. In 2019, my wife and I started a Celebrate Recovery Ministry and led it for 4 incredible years. We facilitated multiple-step studies and saw God radically transform lives through this ministry. We also served as Iowa CR State Reps, helping other Celebrate Recovery ministries throughout Eastern Iowa. We help establish healthy Celebrate Recoveries in one prison, jail, and multiple churches. We are so blessed to see how CR has grown in Iowa.
God led me to publish my first book, From Prison To PURPOSE: Redeemed by God’s Grace. I wrote this book to go into prisons, jails, sober houses, and treatment centers. It’s available on Amazon.com. God has used my story to help others be inspired to follow Jesus and to believe that change is possible. After much prayer and several initial rejections, in January 2021, I was finally approved to go into Bremer County Jail to preach the Word of God. I remember the very first Sunday was Super Bowl Sunday. Over 30 men surrendered their lives to Christ. Despite the roadblocks, I persevered in seeking this opportunity. I faithfully went into the jail for 8 months to minister to inmates each Sunday until I moved to St. Louis, MO, in August 2022.
In August 2022, my wife and I stepped out in faith and moved to St. Louis, Missouri, to plant a new church called Cultivate Church. It is modeled after Celebrate Recovery as a place of healing for the brokenhearted. We felt called to reach the lost and unchurched in our community – those who are hurting and in need of God’s love. After months of preparation and prayer, we launched weekly house church gatherings in April 2023.
Our vision is for Cultivate Church to be a hospital for the broken, where people can experience restoration through genuine community, the life-changing message of the gospel, and the hope found in Jesus Christ. We are excited to see God using our church family to transform lives and win souls for Jesus. We have community gatherings on Thursday evenings. We share a home-cooked meal, do a bible study, and afterward have open share time, and end praying for one another. In March 2023, I was also approved to enter Missouri Eastern Correctional Center, a medium-security prison in Pacific, MO. I have preached every 3rd Sunday since then.
God miraculously connected me to my brother in Christ and a great friend, Bryan Brown. We are now the Celebrate Recovery Inside Ministry Leaders in this prison. We started the first-ever step studies in September. Let’s give God some praise! In March this year, the men will graduate step studies and help us with an entire CR Inside Ministry! Thank you, Jesus! The inmates told me to put my podcast on the inmate tablets. I said okay, let’s pray and ask God to do it. What happened? The Kingdom Minded podcast is on YouTube, Spotify, and the inmate Edovo Learning app. This is available on over one million inmate tablets in prisons and jails throughout the US. Praise God
God miraculously blessed us with a building for our church. We launched our first Sunday service on September 24th. We meet in the Fire Fighters Banquet Hall & Center by Mid Rivers Mall in St. Peters. God is faithful! God has shown me that nothing is impossible and that the Power of God is real and actively transforming people’s lives. Since moving here, my wife and I have witnessed hundreds of salvations on the streets, in nursing homes, in our church, online, and in prisons! All glory to God!
In closing, I encourage you to dream big and never give up. God can take you places you’ve never imagined. Remember, no problem you face is too big for God. When you hear His voice telling you to step out, have courage and obey. Live by faith, not sight. Stay humble with a servant’s heart. You won’t regret it.
Most importantly, never forget – God forgives, and healing is possible. By His power and grace, we can recover and be made new. I’m living proof of that. My story is a testament to God’s redemptive work. If he did it for me, I know He can do it for you too. There is hope. Let Jesus transform your pain into purpose. The best is yet to come!
I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
I have faced many struggles. My parents divorced when I was 6 years old. I was a minority in my school and was bullied and faced racial trauma. I also grew up in extreme poverty. At the age of 13, I joined a gang, and at 17 years old, I was sentenced to 27 years in prison. I faced many obstacles and near-death experiences due to the lifestyle I lived. I have overdosed multiple times. The road to recovery hasn’t been easy. I have had to fight to stay sober. I have 17 years clean today.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might need to be more familiar, what can you tell them about what you do?
I am a Christian content creator. I have a podcast called Kingdom Minded. This is available on YouTube, Spotify, and other major podcast platforms. I have a partnership with Edovo Learning Application. This is the number one learning app for those who are incarcerated. My podcast streams on one million inmate tablets in prisons and jails all over the US. In my podcast, I interview guests, and they share their testimonies. Powerful stories of transformation, restoration, and healing!
My wife and I are the founding pastors of Cultivate Church. We are a recovery church focused on reaching the unchurched. We welcome drug addicts, the homeless, and anyone and everyone to come fellowship with us. We like to describe our church as a hospital for the broken. We frequently speak at recovery meetings and churches, sharing our testimonies. We focus on nursing home ministry, street ministry, prison and jail ministry, and homeless outreach ministry. We can help people live their best lives by overcoming hurts, habits, and hangups. I am the author of “From Prison To Purpose: Redeemed by God’s Grace. This book was donated to US prisons, jails, and substance abuse treatment centers. I aim to give away copies of this book to every prison and jail. I just finished writing my second book called “Overcoming Codependency: A Healing Path with Christ. This book addresses the issue of codependency and people-pleasing. We aim to publish in March 2024. My wife also serves in a women’s prison in Missouri. I have also shared my testimony in multiple prisons throughout the year. I am scheduled to speak in 5 prisons this year!
What changes are you expecting over the next 5-10 years?
I would like to see more healthy churches planted in St. Louis and start transitional housing for inmates being released from prison or jail.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.wearecultivatechurch.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kingdommindedshane/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/shane.blackledge
- Youtube: www.youtube.com/@kingdommindedshane
