Today we’d like to introduce you to Jadyn Doty
Hi Jadyn, thanks for joining us today. We’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
When I was younger I had a really difficult relationship with my body and the way it was viewed in the world. It was a daily struggle to exist both hating myself and feeling that everyone else hated me too. A beloved mentor in my life who also happened to be fat gave the advice one day to unfollow folks who’s bodies didn’t look real, and follow as many people who’s bodies look like mine as I could. And I listened to her!
My social algorithm changed to match the content I was interacting with, and I began to learn more and more about the social issue of fat discrimination. I began learning things I had never heard about. Reading books, listening to podcasts, following blogs, and more. I was making online friends who I connected with over our shared experiences, friends from all across the world! I changed my relationship with my body, it was an incredibly healing journey.
But I was still feeling unsatisfied in life, I didn’t like my job, I wanted more friends (in my area), and most of all, I wanted to feel safe in public. Healing my own relationship with my body didn’t change the way people treated me, and it still hasn’t. But I craved activity and friendship, without the fear of mistreatment.
It was Spring of 2022, and I saw a River Front Times article. The article was about a woman who went to Reddit and posted in R/StLouis something along the lines of “I wish St. Louis had a fat stoner babes hiking club” and the post went crazy. It got so popular in fact, that she made it a reality! The first meet up had tons of people. I was not one of them, as an not stoner, not hiker, it was not the space for me. But it did inspire me. They are right there, hundreds of people who got together over a far more specific shared interest than simple fatness. So I created a Facebook group. “Fat Positive Saint Louis”. I already followed like groups from different large cities, like the “Fat Babe Philly” group. My goal was to create an online space where people could share resources, advice, and maybe even make a friend.
It started slow, first maybe 30 people joined (and half of them were people I already knew). It wasn’t super active for a while. But I was determined to keep the online space afloat. I wanted to be able to find a doctor who wouldn’t mistreat me, a restaurant with accessible seating, events I would be welcomed at.
It was an entire year after I created the Facebook group that I was prompted to host events. I had thought of doing it before, but I had no experience and the idea was too overwhelming. Then, one day my therapist told me to write down three things I want to be different about my life in 5 years. I wrote that I wanted a different job, I wanted a more active social life, and I wanted to find a space where I feel safe moving in my own body.
That was it. If I wanted those things it was my job to make them happen. And if I didn’t feel safe moving my body in public, than I needed to create a space where I did. I was still terrified, and still didn’t know what to do. But the same mentor who had kicked off my journey years back with the advice she gave me, also happened to do event planning for her own community. She helped me plan my first meetup, a casual dinner at the Eckert’s Cider Shed in Belleville. Since that first little meetup, I’ve always been thinking about my next event!
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Planning events is hard! My biggest challenge has been finding the money, time, and resources to make each event happen. Some events, like casual meetups, are pretty low lift. But others, like the two pool parties I put on over the summer, are a huge undertaking.
The pool parties are the perfect example, though that event had a paid ticket entry, the upfront costs were large. Though the ticket sales helped me recover, the payout for tickets is not until after the event, and I had to front costs for the venue, food, drinks, and labor were large. The time it took to plan, market, buy, and setup was exhausting on top of my full time job and my daily responsibilities.
I’m incredibly fortunate to have a network of lovely friends and family who have been able to support me in making each event happen. I cannot stress enough how important it has been to lean on my people to make these events happen!
Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
Fat Positive Saint Louis is still in it’s toddler years as an organization.
Formally, Fat Positive Saint Louis is a group formed to provide joy, support, and community for plus sized folks in the greater Saint Louis area. We believe all bodies deserve to feel safe and loved. It is our goal to not only create an additional space, but to highlight the already existing local environments, businesses, creators, events, and more. FPSTL aims to make fat community accessible for all.
Our Facebook group is a private group for fat folks in STL to find resources and community. This group requires admin approval to join and is closely monitored at all times. The Facebook page is a safe space to ask questions, seek advice, find events, and make friends.
The most important thing about my organization is that I want to bring people together and allow them to feel safe and comfortable. The moment I knew I was meeting my goals was when a person who attended an FPSTL event told me she a person there who has become one of her closest friends. Knowing that there are people in the world who get to spend time with loved ones who they know because of something I created? It means everything to me, and it means even more to the younger version of myself who felt so isolated.
The most special thing about FPSTL is that it is so unique. There are like organizations in other cities, but FPSTL is the only St. Louis based organization with the goal of bringing together an existing fat community.
Can you talk to us about how you think about risk?
Personally, in my life, I’m whatever the opposite of a risk taker is. My decisions are calculated, and made anxiously, with the goal of minimizing room for error. Admittedly, this minimizes opportunity for success.
Making risky moves is necessary to grow an organization. First and foremost, starting in the creation of the project. Are you making something people want to be involved with? Is each investment going to pay off?
My biggest risk was the amount I invested in our pool parties. People wanted them, and they wanted them to be a big deal. But these events are huge, the venues can cost thousands of dollars, then food, and drinks (with a bartender to serve them), the time it took to setup, breakdown, all of it. If they weren’t successful I would be out thousands of dollars, and a immeasurable amount of time and energy.
Luckily my largest events were some of my most popular. The large investment allowed me to create something incredibly special. The response from the community was overwhelmingly positive, and the memories made are unbeatable.
I’ve also had my fair share of failed events and investments that haven’t paid off. When you are working at the scale that I am, one failed event could be catastrophic. I’ve been really intentional about where my investments go and where I scale back. All I can do is keep trying to hold that balance as we grow.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://fatpositivestl.wixsite.com/fat-positive-saint-l
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fatpositivesaintlouis?igshid=NzZlODBkYWE4Ng%3D%3D&utm_source=qr
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/3267425200158217/?ref=share_group_link&exp=93fa
- Other: https://linktr.ee/fatpositivesaintlouis?utm_source=linktree_profile_share<sid=123c52cb-ae31-4ebf-9ed7-400882139267
