Today we’d like to introduce you to Apurva Sinha.
We all face challenges, but looking back would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
COVID-19 was not eminent in the picture back then. I was overjoyed upon seeing my family after a long hiatus. Little did I know that this probably was one of the most testing times in my life? I was supposed to move to Toronto, Canada, for a short project shortly after I got back to the US from India. I was elated. A new project to work on and a brand new country to explore! There are times in your life when you feel that things just happen to fall in the right place. You can come across all the sad news on the TV or run into miserable people and empathize and all of that, but times like these make you blindside to the fact that things change and you have to be prepared for the falls also. The highs do not last forever. Ok so, I lost my job shortly after COVID-19 hit. I was still in India, almost a week away from boarding my flight back to the US, when I lost my job.
The company business took a huge fall and the revenues dropped so much that they did not have money to pay the employees. I was devastated. Hey, wasn’t I the king of my life till yesterday? I had things planned out. I had things to do, to look forward to, make my parents proud of me and check my secret wish lists! Strict immigration policies don’t allow you to travel back without a job, and it was difficult finding a job from outside the US at that time, let alone finding a job during one of the most massive recessions. I broke up with someone who I’d thought I would spend the rest of my life with. It was like a game of Jenga. One wrong placement and the entire thing comes down. I spent many sleepless nights (oh, about a year and half to be precise) just thinking about things. I suffered from severe depression, anxiety and an inferiority complex. I’d lock myself up in the bathroom and bawl away. Pretend nothing happened once I got outside just so that my parents do not worry about me.
My self-confidence shattered and I felt replaceable in every aspect of my life – work and relationships alike. I would spend hours applying for jobs during the day, sometimes giving interviews, only to be rejected due to visa issues. My confidence bogged down so much that I couldn’t even talk to people. With COVID at its peak, staying indoors, pretending nothing has happened and my mental health taking a toll every single day, I gained a lot of weight, felt sick and even looked up for painless ways to die. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t run into hardships before; it was just that I wasn’t prepared for it. Well, adversities don’t give you advance notice. We know that bad times don’t last forever. BUT, when you’re in the pickle, it is easier said than done. Every figment of your being tries to go back and forth between being optimistic and pessimistic. I sought a counsellor’s assistance but let me tell you a thing about that. Only YOU can pull yourself out of a situation. It’s easier said than done, I know I have said it before! I really, really respect people who found their way out of dark places in life.
If you had to, what characteristic of yours would you give the most credit to?
I won’t be all motivational here. I think patience and having the right people in your life who hold you up when you fall were extremely important in my story. I eventually found a company that helped me get back. I am going to start afresh like a new leaf. Also, remember to check in with yourself every now and then. The rat race eats the best of us. Unfortunately, ‘fake it till you make it’ doesn’t always hold true.
Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
Hi! I moved to the United States from India five years ago as a graduate student in St. Louis, Missouri. I now work as a Software Developer in a multinational consulting firm. Honestly, I do not have all the things figured out for me like most other people (hopefully!) but I try to navigate the highs and lows that life has to offer to the best I can. I want to talk about a thing or two that I learnt along the way, especially during last year in 2020 when the whole world agonized due to the pernicious virus. Ah, the irony. Apparently, a tiny virus can cause the wreck and havoc that literally destroyed millions of families around the world. Thus affirming my beliefs that sometimes even the smallest of things have the power to overturn the entire course of one’s being. I am no exception.
Up until early 2020, I took pride in having quit smoking, being comfortable in my crooked smile and being financially independent. It just felt liberating. I felt secure and sometimes even wondered about how people run into problems and dreaded putting myself in their spot because I had goosebumps at the mere thought of imagining myself having to tackle any of those amorphous situations in life. I had a humble beginning in India. Both my parents, very early on in my life, taught me the importance of being kind and nice to people. I didn’t know that this would help me in this story, eventually much later in life. My story begins in March 2020 when I was visiting my family in India after a good 2.5 years.
Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?
I am a software developer by profession. I have a degree in Information Systems. I guess I am known for going out of my way and helping people. I love making people smile. I am most proud of my relationships with my friends and family. You know, you don’t realize it, life happens but the most important thing is to have people by your side whilst you navigate its lows and highs.
Contact Info:
- Email: apurvasinha93@gmail.com
- Instagram: apurvable, apurvable2.0
