Lauryn Pyatt shared their story and experiences with us recently and you can find our conversation below.
Good morning Lauryn, we’re so happy to have you here with us and we’d love to explore your story and how you think about life and legacy and so much more. So let’s start with a question we often ask: What are you chasing, and what would happen if you stopped?
As someone who overthinks on a daily basis, the one thing that I desperately desire is peace. My mind is one that never rests, and it can be exhausting sometimes. One of my biggest struggles in life is my war with excessive self-criticism and perfectionism. The voice inside my head likes to judge, accuse, analyze, critique, and insult the majority of my thoughts and feelings. I am chasing peace, but also learning how to love and accept myself the way Jesus does. I am choosing to chase change so I can continue to spread the Lord’s love and finally view myself as enough, just the way He created me. If I stopped chasing these things, then I won’t be doing anything to help my mental health. I would spiral into darkness and believe every lie that entered my brain. I am chasing a healthier mentality to honor God and His people, which includes myself as well.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
My name is Lauryn Pyatt, and I am a photographer located in the St. Louis area. I started “Lauryn Lens” over a year ago, and it has been such a blessing to connect with people and to be able to encourage them. I love photography, but people are my true passion. One of the most joyful experiences in life is meeting new people. Being a photographer has introduced me to many new faces and has given me the opportunity to try to love them well. I’m a senior in college now, and I’m not sure what my specific career plans look like yet, but I am beyond excited to see where God leads!
Appreciate your sharing that. Let’s talk about your life, growing up and some of topics and learnings around that. Who were you before the world told you who you had to be?
I was told by the world that I was annoying, too loud and that I had too much energy. I’ve been told to calm down or to chill out countless times, and all I was doing was existing. I was silenced because I was joyful and enthusiastic about life, and people found that obnoxious. I let that label define me for a long time, and it became the most hurtful insult anyone could call me. I still think being called annoying hurts the worst because of the impact it had on me during that time. Words carry weight, and I can still feel it sometimes. My therapist told me “If I’m too much, go find less” and that quote has been one of my favorites. I think that it is such a beautiful thing to have so much joy in your heart that it overflows. Having a lot of enthusiasm and energy for life is so precious in a world that can feel so dark. Although different personalities are bound to clash and being annoyed with one another is inevitable, it’s very disheartening to think that some people might believe a person’s presence is annoying. There’s a difference between being annoyed with a person’s action and/or behavior and labeling a person as annoying. Thinking someone’s entire existence is so saddening. Phrasing matters as well as the way we speak to one another. Although people have and will continue to find my presence on this Earth annoying, that won’t stop me from being joyful, energetic and enthusiastic. It might hurt a little when I hear it, but this world will not define who I am. We were all created so uniquely and intentionally, and that is praiseworthy! There will never be someone else like you. You are the only you that will ever exist, and that’s special.
Was there ever a time you almost gave up?
During my freshman and sophomore years of high school, I struggled with suicidal ideation and self-harm. I believed I was worthless and unlovable. I genuinely thought my life was meaningless and that it wouldn’t matter if I took my own life. At 16 years old, I remember pleading God to take me, and that was before I truly knew Christ. I hated every single thing about myself, and I thought I deserved pain. That’s why I would hurt myself. I battled suicidal thoughts everyday for some length of time, and my mental health was the poorest it had ever been. Living with those disturbing, hateful and graphic thoughts and urges was the lowest point in my life, and it was a traumatic time for my loved ones. Despite my suffering, I knew in the pits of my soul that I would get better. It was something bigger than my own comprehension that in the midst of being suicidal, I felt it in my heart that I would be okay one day. Jesus wanted me to choose life. My flesh considered giving into the darkness several times, but I couldn’t because God had plans for me to live in His light. I didn’t acknowledge Jesus as my Savior until I was 18, but I truly believe He provided the support, mental health resources and help that I needed to get better. Because of His love, I know my life has purpose. My heart beats for mental health matters, and I wouldn’t be here without Jesus.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. What would your closest friends say really matters to you?
My closest friends have said that mental health is one of the most important things to me. I get extremely passionate about it because of how close it is to my heart. I’ve seen the impact of mental health issues on myself, my loved ones and people I don’t even know. I will never stop talking about it because advocacy and awareness saves lives. What also really matters to me is loving God and loving His people. As a follower of Christ, it is the greatest commandment in the Bible to love the Lord with all of your heart, soul, and mind, with the second commandment being to love your neighbor. I am flawed and will never love God or people perfectly, but I try my best. I think that mental health and love intertwine because I once believed I was unloved, and it is a devastating feeling. I want people to experience the love of Jesus so that they would permanently believe that they are loved and never question it. Christians are called to love people, so I often pray that God would continue to teach me to love the way He does and to help share it.
Okay, we’ve made it essentially to the end. One last question before you go. What do you understand deeply that most people don’t?
Being sensitive generally isn’t viewed as a valuable or ideal trait to have according to opinions I have heard, but I’ve learned how beautiful it is to feel things so deeply. I am a sensitive person, and I used to feel like my sensitivity made me weak. I’m soft-hearted, and I don’t think that will ever change. I will cry if I’m yelled at. Having thick skin just isn’t in my skill set, and that’s alright with me! I am so grateful that I feel things so fully. It’s a blessing to be joyful as a sensitive person just as it would be to feel sadness. I don’t think my sensitivity is a curse because it amplifies the amount I feel. Whatever the emotion may be, I’m going to be thankful that I can feel. I don’t think I would like feeling numb and desensitized to the world around me. My emotions are more intense than the average person, and it’s how I was created. I think sensitivity also helps me be more empathetic, and I value that so I can support people. Being sensitive in a world that can be insensitive offers a different kind of beauty.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurynlens/
