Today we’d like to introduce you to Kimberly Dabney.
Hi Kimberly, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your back story with our readers?
The evolution of my entrepreneurial journey began when I was around twelve years old. My gift of hair styling is a God given talent. I was anointed, created and called to work behind the chair as a stylist. I have worked in the salon industry for more than twenty six years. My chair is far more than a seat for clients to sit in to receive hair cutting, styling and coloring services. Hair, beauty and fashion are my niche. My first experience with hair cutting occurred at the age of five. I cut my mom’s hair while she was asleep. I figured she needed a new look. They say a woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life. Some part of my innocent mind thought it was perfectly ok to cut my mom’s hair. Of course my mother wasn’t happy but the bright side was it exposed my gift and artistic abilities. We might not have ever discovered my passion, talent and creativity for the arts. I agree with the statement leaders are born and not made. However, I believe our skills, gifts, talents and abilities have to be germinated and cultivated.
I thank God for both of my parents as well as my step-parents, grandmothers, God parents, aunts and uncles for investing in my overall growth and development. I’m grateful I have an amazing support system. It’s a blessing to have people who not only support your dreams but also push and encourage you to achieve them. The moment my mom noticed I was serious about my work as a hairstylist she took me to purchase every size electric curling iron there was. I did not know how to use marcel irons well at the time. I had all sizes ranging in between large and small. One day I decided I wanted to style more than my friends, my little sister and her friend’s hair. It was time for me to take my business on the road and get my name out in the streets. I started walking around the neighborhood going door to door servicing clients at the age twelve. God blessed me with eagle’s eyes. I’m a visionary, truth teller and natural born leader. My passion for hair styling led me to pursue a career in the field full time. I started working in my first professional salon at the age of seventeen. Many were surprised when I began in the salon due to me being so young and inexperienced with working in a professional salon setting. I came straight out of high school with an undeniable skill set, talent, loyal stable clientele and work ethic which afforded me the opportunity to work in some of the best salons throughout the St. Louis metro area.
I was born and raised in the heart of the city. I attended Gundlach Elementary off of Arlington on the west side of St. Louis. I have so many memories of having to stand up for myself which explains why I have the heart of a fighter. I always tell people being pretty isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I was often teased and bullied because my parents kept us well dressed and groomed like dolls. Not everyone around me was being reared with the same type of love and care I was accustomed to. I don’t have the prettiest life story but it’s not the worst by far. Life was different growing up in the city but there are many things I love, value and appreciate about urban living. My upbringing keeps me humble and gives me reason to keep striving to become my highest and greatest self.
We later moved to Pine Lawn where I attended Bishop Elementary. One thing I loved when I attended city schools was living directly across the street from them. Sometimes that didn’t work in my favor. For example, I recall when I was in first grade and the principal wanted to paddle me for getting in trouble in class. I wasn’t having it. I refused to allow him to touch me. Of course he called my mom and that didn’t end well. I have always believed in justice and standing up for what’s right. I was defending myself from another child who had been bullying me. I’ve always been a logical thinker. The principal’s rationale didn’t make sense to me. However, I later understood it was more about my disrespect for his authority and reaction to his attempt to reprimand me. I didn’t care about getting in more trouble. Being wrongfully punished was worth me standing my guard. At least that’s what I thought at the time. I shared this story to give an example of how we are already shaped and molded into who God intends for us to become. We have to learn, grow and develop into the person he has preordained for us to become. Leadership, advocacy and philanthropy have been in my veins for as long as I can remember. One of my childhood friend’s mother named me “Logical” because she said I was such a rationale and logical thinker at a young age. God made me different for a reason. While I was a social butterfly I never really fit in with everybody else. I had my own style and vibe. Unfortunately that brought me a lot of enemies. Especially once we moved from the city to the county.
We later moved to Hathaway Manor better known as the “Dime” in North County where I attended Meadows Elementary, Riverview Gardens Jr. High and High School. I was elated because my dad lived in Castle Point and I could walk to his house. Some think living in the suburbs is peaches and creams but that isn’t always the case. I have plenty of stories to tell about growing up in Hathaway. I endured more than my fair share of bullying, jealousy, envy, scandal, public humiliation and fighting to defend myself. I was always popular and well known in school. Despite my mysterious demeanor and regal presence I have a very outgoing, fun, loving and bubbly personality. My gift of hairstyling and creativity for fashion styling tends to precede me everywhere I go. Growing up some of my elders told me I was special because I was different. My presence commands attention without me speaking a word. People recognize me by my work and fashion sense. The Bible says in Proverbs 18:16 (NIV), “A gift opens the way and ushers the giver into the presence of the great.”
My work in the field led me to amazing places and open doors of opportunity I never imagined myself walking through. I became very well known in the city making more money than I knew what to do with being I was young and immature. I purchased my first two story home at the age twenty-one in a historic area in the city of St. Louis known as Lafayette Square. God blessed me to buy a beautiful 2006 Lexus a few years later. I was on top of the world so I thought at the time. I had a beautiful home and family. I had no clue I would end up in head on car collision that would leave me crippled with a crooked leg and end my salon career for almost six months. My life took a complete turn for the worst after that. I pretty much lost everything.
After going through some very difficult trials with my son’s father I decided to move to Houston. The transition was challenging for me initially. I went through a serious culture shock. My life in Houston verses the life I lived in St. Louis was like night and day. I went through many difficult test and trials all of which were designed by the enemy to stop me from getting to where I am today. BUT GOD! The greatest blessing my mother and father gave me were teaching me how to build my faith, the importance of walking according to the word and living life with Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I am a faith walker who views problems as an opportunity to grow and overcome. I have owned two brick and mortar salons along with a salon and clothing boutique inside of salon suites. I mostly enjoyed managing several corporate owned salons were I was responsible for recruiting, building, managing and developing the team while overseeing the day to day operations.
Statistics said I would end up on welfare forever due to the fact I was a teenage mother whom became a single parent after my oldest son’s dad was sentenced to what may as well be a life term in prison. Learning that news while doing some research on the internet was devastating for me. Finding out that news was another gut wrenching and heartbreaking testimony I don’t care to share at this time. I make a point to defy the odds when they’re stacked against me. Every time someone told me I couldn’t or wouldn’t do something I would do my due diligence to study, learn, practice and master it. I’m of the mindset we can do whatever we put our minds to. Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. People told me I couldn’t but the Lord said I could so I did. It shocked a lot of people when I graduated with my Bachelor’s degree in Business Management. I faced many challenges while in school. I had six operations and became unemployed due to my being placed on mandatory medical leave. God’s plans are perfect. Despite the fact I faced obstacle after obstacle I completed my degree and went on to get a job working as a manager for JCPenney Salons which was one of the most rewarding experiences in my career.
I can’t say it was easy because I was working as a full time manager, later opening my brick and mortar salon along with managing the responsibility of raising my two sons as a single mother. Raising brown boys is a challenge all within itself. Prayer was truly my lifeline and saving grace at that time. It was only by God’s grace I graduated and did very well I might add. Unfortunately, I found myself facing more health challenges. I ended up back in the hospital but this time it wasn’t my physical body. Sadly my God brother was murdered back home in St. Louis. I was heartbroken and devastated. Something changed inside of me spiritually when I came back to Houston from the funeral. I was triggered and had a psychological break down while in my office at work. While I was aware of what caused me to break I didn’t feel I had a safe place to share it with anyone. I had bottled up all of the painful emotions and deceived myself into thinking I was ok. Looking back I wish I would’ve felt safe to confide in someone. Psychological breaks are not easy to endure and breaking down at work was not a good look at all. It was one of the most embarrassing and debilitating moments of my life. I did my best to avoid making other people aware I was suffering with mental health disorders. It has always been taboo in the African American community to discuss and admit to suffering with mental illness. I was reluctant to share my battle due to my being enrolled in a Master’s of Psychology program at Houston Baptist University at the time. I was afraid of being black balled. It is one of the most prestigious schools in the country. I feared losing my opportunity and didn’t want to risk aqcuiring my credentialing. I was very apprehensive but felt forced to make a decision and decided to voluntarily check myself into a psychiatric hospital. It had become a matter of life or death for me. Suicide was trying to claim my life and the enemy had begun to torment me with suicidal ideations daily. I desired to live but my will to fight was dwindling away. There wasn’t a moment in the day I didn’t think about making some sort of attempt to harm myself. I had grown tired of fighting what felt like a losing battle. I knew admitting myself into the hospital was necessary. I had no idea what I was walking into but I knew in my heart it was the best thing for me to do if I wanted to stay alive and safe. The Lord used a bad situation and turned it for my good. I went in voluntarily but had no clue of what I had signed for. Know that when we seek to do good evil is always present. The enemy had a plan too. There I was sitting in the psychiatric hospital and once again I found myself being verbally attacked by another resident. Naturally I defended myself verbally but that didn’t work out in my favor. I was wrongfully committed and switched to involuntary admission which prevented me from leaving. I had to go before a judge due to one of the doctors trying to have me committed for sixty days. Once again I will say BUT GOD! The judge not only recognized that I was of a sound mind she identified the fact I was overwhelmed from having so many responsibilities along with my health battles. I was released after two weeks. There is a lot more to this testimony. You will have to purchase my book to get the rest of the tea.
My desire to become a mental health professional grew stronger after my experience in the psychiatric hospital. I saw how patients were being mistreated and misunderstood. My heart ached and I knew God had called me to be a voice and advocate for those who suffered with mental health disorders. I am here to help individuals who desire to live a normal life but don’t because they don’t know how to do so. Many people who suffer with mental illness don’t have a safe place to share their feelings and express what was in their hearts. I desired to be that person and safe place because I knew what it felt like to not have that. I proudly continued on my journey of acquiring my Master’s degree and was successful. There I was at the end of my program, exactly one week away from taking my final exam and found myself being brutally sexually assaulted. Most people would have called it quits but I refused. Being raped to the degree I experienced took a toll on me spiritually, mentally and emotionally. I ended up having another embarrassing psychological breakdown. Except this time I was working at an elementary school along with operating my consulting, salon and boutique businesses. I questioned why God. I wondered why he kept allowing me to have these psychological breaks. I ended up back in the hospital but my experience the second time was very different from the first. It was a lot more, helpful, enjoyable, and enlightening. Going through long term psychiatric care changed my life for the better. I committed to therapy for more than three years of which I still attend weekly. It was the best thing I’ve ever done outside of falling in love with Jesus. I had a spiritual awakening. I finally found the root cause of my issue. I discovered I had been living in the shadows of other people’s opinion and the pain of trauma from being sexually abused at different periods throughout my life. It wasn’t until I completely surrendered and committed to the therapeutic process that I became aware of God’s divine purpose for allowing me to birth in the earth. More importantly, I had a clearer understanding of why I had been chosen to carry the burden of sexual abuse and mental illness. I understood the Lord had called and chose me for such a time as this. He broke me down to build me up. God equipped and prepared me to do a greater work which I’m currently thriving in. There is a lot more to my story which I’m sharing my upcoming book “Pretty Insecure” and on my Podcast Show “Behind The Mind With Kimberly Vonshay”. This is only a small highlight of God’s goodness and how he has showed up in my life time and time again. I did not end up here by happens chance. It was all a part of God’s plan. I now counsel and coach other individuals on how to heal from the inside out using faith, prayer and therapy.
We all face challenges, but looking back would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
My journey has not been smooth sailing at all. I’ve had many obstacles to overcome from closing my businesses to losing clients, facing health challenges and legal battles. Success is a beautiful thing until adversity raises its ugly head. Most entrepreneurs don’t talk about the early mornings, sleepless nights, hitting rock bottom when sales are down and clients aren’t booking. Entrepreneurship is not for the weak at heart. Discipline, consistency and prayer are the keys to winning in any business. It becomes very challenging when you’re doing all you know to do and things seem to still be falling apart. I think my greatest obstacle was finding my tribe. It has not easy to find people whose mindset, work ethic and drive matched mine. Honestly this is an area I’m still working to build and perfect. I don’t ever see defeat in the face of adversity. Obstacles, setbacks, shortcomings, downfalls, pitfalls and facing adversity are all opportunities for us to learn and grow. In the world of psychology we would table this as locust of control. I believe we have control over our outcome based on what we choose to think, believe and act on. An individual’s perception about why they went through certain events has an huge impact on how he or she responds in the face of adversity. Those who have an internal control orientation believe we have the power to change our life and create better circumstances by guiding our behaviors through our personal choices, daily habits and practices.
My faith was put to the test April of last year when I became very ill one Sunday afternoon. One of my Uncles whom is a Pastor and my spiritual mentor advised me to go get checked out at the hospital. I was obedient and went to the emergency room. They ran a series of test. One of which revealed a mass on my colon. I honestly wasn’t surprised as Holy Spirit had already revealed to me cancer was setting up in my body. Naturally I was praying and believing God for healing. I had been ill for a while but was afraid to actually go in and hear the test results. Many probably questioned why I would play with my life but the truth is I was tired of going through health battles, dealing with chronic illnesses and constantly having surgeries. God spoke to me one Sunday afternoon promising he was going to continue covering me and I would be completely healed. I took him at his word. I trusted the Lord with my whole heart in spite of the negative report from the doctors. I had seen reports of death before but God told me it was not so. I believed I was going to live and not die. God had too much work for me to do. The more I fought the weaker I became. I began to lose weight and my hair started to shed profusely. Deep down inside I was afraid, angry, hurt, broken, bitter and ashamed. I couldn’t understand why God continued to allow me to go through such difficult battles with sickness and disease. It got to the point I couldn’t eat due to my being unable to keep food on my stomach. I could barely drink liquids without them immediately coming back up.
The challenge for me was getting up everyday putting on a mask to look like everything was perfectly fine when I had to go outside in the public’s eye. I always showed up to work with a smile and never complained despite the many days my stomach and body wreaked of pain. I walked around sick for over a year but very few people were aware I was battling with a serious illness. Many applauded and admired my strength once I was released to share my testimony of how God miraculously cured me. I’ll never forget how sick I was the morning I went in for the colonoscopy. I still had a smile and praise in my heart despite how I was feeling. I decided I was going to praise my way through. I sang gospels songs the entire ride heading to the doctor’s office. I stayed up most of the night before praying and thanking God for my healing. Holy Spirit had spoke to me exactly seven days before my surgery stating the following, “I allowed you to get sick so that I could heal you and show people I am still performing miracles in the earth.” I remember crying my heart out as I had a dream the night before of my Godmother whom had recently passed away. She was wrapped in one of my favorite pink blankets. I woke up abruptly. It was at that moment I knew cancer had invaded my body. I also knew God had given me a word and revelation. I reached out to one of my dear brothers in Christ Prophet Jermaine Green who spoke a powerful word of truth and confirmed that cancer was in my body but he also stated the Lord was going to heal me. I received the word and believed it.
My faith was fully activated and I walked as if it was already done. I was fearful as they were putting me asleep but when I woke up I felt different. I knew something had changed. Things seemed a little strange because I was left in the room alone. The nurse came in telling me to get dressed and I could go home. I was perplexed because I was barely able to walk into the office on my own now she’s saying I can just leave. The doctor came in notifying me he did not see the mass anymore and there was no longer signs of the colitis. My exact words were, “thank you Jesus you are truly a promise keeper!” This wasn’t the first time I had seen God perform miracles in my life so I wasn’t surprised at all.
While I was ecstatic about my healing and deliverance the enemy was not. He didn’t wait long to wage war and send one of his imps to attack me. I learned quickly to be careful about sharing my good news and testimony with people who don’t have the spiritual wisdom, faith, understanding or emotional capacity to handle my truth. Like clockwork rumors began to spread and accusations began to fly. I didn’t care about who was saying what, who believed me or who didn’t. I simply wanted to continue recovering and was grateful God had healed me. I knew what I had been through and more importantly what God had told me about my healing. My sons could attest to how ill I was. It broke my heart to see them worried about me. They gave me strength to keep pushing and fighting when the enemy was trying to convince me I was going to die of cancer. Of course I had moments where I became weak and wanted to quit. I was tired and all out of strength to fight because my health was slowly deteriorating. Mentally I was drained and spiritually broken but God’s love for me remained unfailing. When he spoke that word informing me he had allowed me to get sick and promised to heal me it lit a match under me. I made it a point to get up and look well every day even if I felt like death was on my back. I walked out my faith until it manifested and became my reality. The diagnoses was a giant which appeared to be impossible to defeat but like David I took the power I had within me and threw it at everything the enemy sent to kill and destroy me. It is my faith, hard work and belief in God that brought me out. It is because of Jesus Christ I am victorious and have overcome. Now I am here to educate, empower and encourage others to do the same.
Can you tell our readers more about what you do and what you think sets you apart from others?
I am a hair, fashion and life stylist. I specialize in cutting, coloring, a variety of hair styling services and coach people into becoming their best self according to God’s word and will for their lives. I own and operate an online women’s clothing boutique. I enjoy mentoring young women who are interested in working and building businesses in the field of hair, fashion and beauty. I am known for my keen fashion sense, hair cutting, coloring and weaving skills. What sets me apart from everyone else is I stand in my difference confidently, courageously and boldly. Individuality is what makes the world of art and creativity beautiful. What sets me apart from others is the experience I give my clients when they are in my chair. I value who they are as people and care about them overall. My chair is an opportunity to get to know them as well as spread the good news about Jesus Christ while making them look and feel good. I’ve been told I have a natural talent for counseling. I’ve been this way since I was a child. Reasoning, processing and thinking things through rationally are a few of my strong traits. I always knew how to calm people down while helping them to draw conclusions peacefully, rationally and realistically. I’m a natural at mediating difficult situations. God blessed me with the ability to mediate and convince all parties involved to hold themselves accountable. It’s important to approach challenging situations differently.
Problems are made to be solved. My difference is in the fact I’m solution oriented. I think about finding the solutions more than focusing on the problem. Situations other people may view as impossible tasks to conquer appear solvable and minuscule in my eyes. One of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my salon business was seeking further education to become a colorist. I sought to serve a market that would allow me to differentiate myself and stay in demand in the market. Mastering the art of coloring and formulating custom colors put me in the driver’s seat and set me apart. Understanding color chemistry and formulation put me in my own lane. Color correction has become an area of expertise for me which keeps me in high demand. In the past I worked with clients who suffered with alopecia. At the end of their services they would always highlight how much they appreciated my being patient with them while showing genuine care and concern. It is my sincere heart and mindset about business that keeps me on the cutting edge.
Can you talk to us about how you think about risk?
I strongly believe in taking risk. They help to cultivate a growth mindset. There are many businesses, books, million dollar inventions and gifts lying dead in a grave due to people being too afraid to step out and manifest their dreams. There are risk factors associated with business and entrepreneurship. Fear is one of the biggest factors keeping some people from launching out into the deep to manifest the visions God has placed inside of them. I personally see risk the same way I view problems, as opportunities. They both provide us with a chance to learn and grow. Remember, perspective is everything! Risk builds resiliency, tenacity and helps to increase our faith in God. The Bible tells us in James 1:3, “For we know that when your faith is tested your endurance has a chance to grow. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete not lacking anything.” Life is all about choices. Risk requires us to make a decision. We can choose to walk out our faith and take risk believing we will yield positive results or we can choose to not take risk and stay stuck where we are. The bad part is people who don’t take risk find themselves always wondering what could have been. Later they’ll find themselves wallowing in regret, shame and guilt later on in life.
Those who fear walking in the unknown tend to be more reluctant and apprehensive when risk is involved because they don’t want to lose. Some people rather play it safe to maintain their images and fit in the status quo. That mindset does not work well in business. Natural born leaders are visionaries. The CEO of the company does not typically think the way the employee does. The President has different visions, roles, purposes and operational functions within the organization. The leader has to be a forward thinker understanding the risk factors associated involved with the business. I’m reminded of Habakkuk 2:2, “And the LORD answered me, write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it.” Lack of planning leads to failed risk. People who plan tend to be more successful than those who don’t. The key to overcoming the fear associated with risk is creating a solid strategy. Pray and execute. God’s plans for your life are perfect.
I have taken many risks throughout my career. I’m a big risk taker because I dream and believe big. I understand eyes have not seen nor have ears heard what the Lord has in store for me. Believing in the unknown and unseen required me to step out on faith. Doing so was a huge risk for me. My deciding to relocate to Houston was the biggest risk I’ve ever taken. I made a sound decision to leave everything I knew and worked hard to build in St. Louis behind including selling my home and shutting down my business. I regretted not keeping my home as a real estate investment property but I lived and learned. I left a city where I was well respected and known by everyone to come to a new territory where I felt unfit and was unknown. I knew there would be challenges involved in me relocating but my faith in God outweighed my fears. He kept his promise to me and gave me back everything I lost. I regained pretty much everything I left behind. There is power in obedience. When we take risk to obey God, follow his instructions and work hard to complete the assignments God mandates our potential of losing on the back end decreases significantly. You can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens you! I have several stories I can share about starting businesses and closing them. One thing I noticed each time I closed and reopened the new business would always be better and more profitable than the previous. I gathered from that we have to let go of old things to acquire new things. My biological father once told me God won’t give you something better if you want let go of what you’re holding onto. Those were great words of wisdom I still carry with me. The greatest risk I’ve taken is putting my life in his hands. Doing so has yielded me a priceless return. His love is unmatched and unfailing. Try him and take him at his word. I promise you won’t regret it!
Pricing:
- One on One Coaching & Consulting: $75-$150
- One On One Coloring Class: Starting at $500
- Group Coloring Class: Starting At: $2,500
- Balayage & Cut $320 and up
- Balayage $285 and up
- Silk Press, Cut & Style $120 and up
- Shampoo & Style $65 and up
Contact Info:
- Email: Kimberlyvonshay@gmail.com
- Website: www.Kimberlyvonshay.com | www.Luxe-kouture.com
- Instagram: Kimberly Vonshay (Salon) Luxe Kouture (Boutique) Pretty Virtuous Girl Society (Non Profit)
- Facebook: Kimberly Vonshay (Salon) Luxe Kouture (Boutique) Pretty Virtuous Girl Society (Non Profit)
- Spotify, Google & Apple Podcast: Behind The Mind With Kimberly Vonshay
Image Credits
Luv Angela Marie Studios
Face of Curuhj
Face By Scotti
